Plumbing?

I'm certain plumbers may not be adequately compensated for the work they do. This I know after spending the morning trying to unstop my clogged sink/garbage disposal/dishwasher. Ugh.

Here's how all the fun and games started: I thought the disposal was actually for disposing of things. Turns out, it's not really a good idea. At least not edamame (that's soy beans in case you are wondering).  Geesh. I think the disposal is an evil appliance and perhaps the only thing I should put in it is water. So first the disposal clogs up then the sink drain starts to back up then the dishwasher gets in on the action and fills up with all the overflowing water.

Closing my eyes and wishing really, really hard for it to magically drain didn't work and, I was left with only two options: call a someone to fix it for me or do it myself.  Grrr. Most every one I know is working (go figure) except for the actual plumbers who want to be paid to fix these problems.  So, in light of my current frugalness,  I went and put on my big girl panties and asked Google for assistance. 

After typing "How do I unclog my disposal?" into the search field I was quickly rewarded with 80,800 result in .28 seconds. Well, alrighty then.  First I need a plunger and then I need some Liquid Plumber (much cheaper than the human  plumber I'm guessing). Thankfully I not only have both of those I actually find them rather quickly!

Step 1: try running the disposal a few extra times to see if that would unclog it. Nope. But the fountain that shot up outta the sink was pretty cool. Grrr. Moving on the step 2: plunging. Oh, that was a barrel of fun. Plunge one side and water shoots out the other side. I'm now soaking wet, the floor is soaking  wet, but the sink is draining ever so slooooooooowly. Step 3: pour in Liquid Plumber and wait. So, now I wait. And contemplate the usefulness of a piece of equipment that can't even chew up a few soy beans. Really?? Maybe I'll go take a shower and hope that drain doesn't clog up too! 

Happiness is NOT...

Chiggers. Evil little...what the heck are chiggers anyway? Per the internet which never lies (or it least this website...http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0002309/) "Chiggers are tiny, six-legged wingless organisms (larvae) that grow up to become a type of mite. Chiggers are found in tall grass and weeds. Their bite causes severe itching." Severe itching? Duh.  There's a lot I don't know about chiggers but here's what I do know: avoid them. At all costs, avoid them!! Here's a little tale about how I learned that lesson.

Ground Zero.  (literally)

You see, I like to take pictures and while I'm not yet a professional, I really like to get into my work, find the right angle, the perfect shot, you know what I mean? So, when I saw the beautiful blue flower growing in the midst of a dry creek bed I couldn't resist climbing in and seeing what I could do with it. I shot it from all angles, practically laying down to get just the perfect shot. Unbeknownst to me I was not alone in this dry creek bed. There were billions and billions of little invisible creatures crawling around in there with me. They found there way onto my clothes and onto my skin. I knew it probably wasn't going to be good when I heard, "hey, there's a little bug on ya". Ugh. I brushed it off but I suspected he wasn't alone. I was right. He had about a million friends and they traveled in packs.  Within just a few hours I was already starting to itch.

Day 1

Argh!!! The itching is not fun and I must find something soon. I look like I have measles or chicken pox! I think maybe alcohol will kill them. Nope. I ask my legions of FaceBook friends for help and recommendations start pouring in. The more I itch, the more I whine and the more recommendations I get. My wonderful BIL had the best one…"scratch them till they bleed and pour alcohol over them. Won't fix anything but you sure won't forget your bug spray next time!" He's a boy scout. I don't like boy scouts right now.

Day 2

This is probably the worst day. I have been to Walmart a dozen times to buy supplies from the onslaught of recommendations. So far Chiggerx is offering the best (albeit, limited) relief. Crap, this is getting expensive! Of course I am continuing to get more smart ass recommendations about bug spray. Really, people? Really? And then it happens...the best, most glorious recommendation of all: mix together lavender oil and tea tree oil and apply. Off to the store I went (again). Lavender oil was a bit harder to find and quit an investment so I was sure hoping it would work. And it did!! Relief...well, sort of, mostly. Better than anything else so far and that was awesome!

 Days 3-7

So, I have now settled into my chigger relief routine: hot shower, scrub with Aveeno Skin Relief soap, 2nd wash with foaming poison ivy wash (yeah, I know but it has awesome menthol stuff that seems to help),cold water rinse, oil combo rub down, special applications of clear nail polish as needed for the really stubborn spots, wander around naked while everything dries and then, maybe, perhaps, get dressed and get something done!

Day 8

The itching has been reduced to minor irritation now, not the full scale torture worthy of getting even the most tight-lipped prisoner to spill everything. And yes, I have added bug spray to my weekend adventure supply pack!

Finding Happiness

I've spent some time recently thinking about my happiness journey. Why I started it, what I have learned about happiness and what the present (versus the past or the future) holds. I think happy memories are wonderful but I don't believe that happiness lives in our past. Looking forward to the future can bring happiness in the anticipation of wonderful possibilities but there are no guarantees. In the present lies your ability to appreciate what is happening as it happens.

I spent a lot of time initially working on my mindset and shifting it out of the past where the things I couldn't change existed. It's funny how much time one can spend revisiting things in the past and wishing they were different. They will never be different. Sometimes that is painful. And sometimes it is freeing. Letting go of the past, accepting that it cannot be changed, can be the step it takes to put you on the road to happiness. 

I've also realized that how you are raised, the environment you grow up in, are big factors in your ability to be happy, to find happiness, to feel joy. I think as we get older we forget that it's the small things that sustain us in happiness. Laughing with friends, rain on a warm spring day, loving those close to us and feeling loved in return.

Happiness is elusive if you are searching for it but it surrounds us all the time if we just open our eyes to see it. What made you happy today?

Happiness is Geocaching!

"The Tree Frog"  

We headed out in search of the first cache with the humidity so heavy and thick it was almost hard to breathe. I was glad I hadn't bothered to do much with my hair!

Cache #1 for the day was hidden in this dense cluster of trees (pic, l.) so in we went, ducking tree branches and dodging sticker bushes.

Might be good to note that apparently I didn't retain the lesson learned from the last adventure as I wore shorts and flip flops. Ugh. I failed to snap a picture of the "cute" little frog this cache was hidden inside which definitely caused me to do a double take before picking it up.


After a slight rain delay, a trip home to put on more appropriate clothes & shoes and a lovely breakfast at the Waffle House we were on our way to the next cache, located near Commerce, OK.

The "Mickey Mantle Monument" geocache seemed rather obvious but did require a bit of looking around before we found it hidden in a fence.Score! 2 for 2 so far for the day! As far as geocaching goes, this was certainly more fun than the previous adventure.

Next up: "This One's To Die For". It was located in Miami near, you guessed it, the cemetery! Kind of made an assumption it would be in the cemetery but alas, it was not. Instead it was across the road, in a cluster of ... trees! Guessing that is a popular geocache hiding location! The clues on this one helped because the cache had changed in appearance from it's original description. This was a "take something, leave something" cache so we took a penny and left, well, a fun little surprise!
3 for 3!! Woo hoo!!

On to cache #4 for the day, "Flyin' High". This one was definitely a grab and go and a very easy find! Make that 4 for 4! We are on fire today folks! Off to cache #5..."The Great Nut Hunter". This one sounded easy and we should have paid more attention to the hint which said it was located "near a lot of shopping" but sadly we did not. So, we walked the tracks and then headed into the trees (yes, more trees!) before we realized we were going to have to trek back to the car and drive over to WALMART since we couldn't get through the trees. But at least we did find it! (If you are keeping score that would now be 5 for 5!)

And then came cache #6..."The Hot Tamale". More trees, more sticker bushes and last but certainly not least...more poison ivy but, alas, no cache! Crap!!!! I'm still enjoying the effects of that last one nearly a week later. Truth be told though I wouldn't change a thing and this whole geocaching thing makes me feel like Indiana Jones so I'm lovin' it and definitely in my happy place!! Oh, and for the record that made us 5 for 6 for the day and that is pretty excellent for newbies I'm guessing.

So, what adventures are you enjoying??

Happiness...is a fun hobby!

I am always looking for fun things to do outside and recently I found a new hobby that allows me to combine a few of my most favorite things: hiking, treasure hunting, and photography. 

Geocaching is basically a real-world, outdoor treasure hunting game that uses GPS-enabled devices to locate caches hidden inside bags or containers all over the world. Players navigate to a specific set of GPS coordinates provided on the website or phone app and then attempt to find the geocache (container) hidden at that location. You can check out the website (www.geocaching.com) for more information.

Caches can be hidden anywhere and I had no idea there were so many hidden so close to home! I also had no idea what a fun adventure it would be!!

Cache #1

So, after a backpacking adventure in NW Arkansas last weekend, we decided to tackle our first hunt. We picked a relatively easy one to start with, 1 star each for difficulty and terrain. (Caches are rated on a 5 star system for difficulty and terrain.) The first one we chose was hidden in Tharp Cemetery in NW Arkansas. Apparently hiding caches in cemeteries is fairly common. This cemetery was very old and quite possibly a Do-It-Yourself location.

 Navigating to the location was fairly easy with the aforementioned handy dandy app I downloaded for the low, low price of $9.99. Not only did it provide a map and driving instructions it also included a compass! A great investment I'd say.  

After arriving at the cemetery we headed off for the ground search, using the compass to get to the correct coordinates. (see what I mean...handy!) Caches are located inside anything from a Ziploc bag to a large container depending on what type it is. Since this particular one was listed as "small" we figured we were looking for a bag.

We read the hints and log notes and basically just wandered around looking for it. It was interesting seeing how old some of the grave markers were, many from the 1800's. It was fun to imagine what life might have been like back in that time and what might have brought them to this final resting place. 

In what seemed like no time at all...success! We found the cache inside a tree! (They can be hidden anywhere, just not buried.) It was indeed a small Ziploc bag with only a tiny log sheet inside, rolled up like a scroll. We signed the sheet and patted ourselves on the back for finding it so quickly.

Cache #2

Of course this just whetted our appetite for more and we quickly used the app to search for another one in the area. There were a lot to choose from and we picked one nearby at a place called "Finger Park". 

This geocache was rated at a 3 for difficulty and a 3.5 for terrain but we did not let that slow us down and off we went!

Quick lesson...when a cache is given a 3.5 for terrain be prepared to walk (a lot) and climb (a lot). 

Perhaps we were a little over zealous. Or maybe 

we just should have read the map a little better, but instead of driving to the park and starting at the trailhead as suggested, we took off through the middle of the park without benefit of a trail, basically bushwhacking our way through the woods. 

(I'm guessing after the early morning bushwhack out of the forest we figured we were experts in this category. Note: we probably weren't experts.)

This is what it looked like starting out...it didn't get better. We were undaunted however. So, on we hiked...and hiked...and hiked. Thankfully, it was a beautiful area and the trees kept the temperature lower than the predicted 85 degrees which actually wasn't bad for mid-August. 

(picture, r.)

 This hunt lasted several hours and took us up hills, down hills, across dry creek beds, over barbed wire (another quick note: that probably was an indicator we were off course) and eventually we circled a pond on private property (see picture, l.) but it sure was pretty. 

Undaunted we made our way through a pasture, dodged cow patties while keeping a wary eye out for the "Beware of" dog, climbed another barbed wire fence and wandered through more woods before discovering we had somehow passed it. So, back we went...

Long story short, we did not find cache #2 but we had a great hike in a pretty sweet little  park and even managed to find the trail on the way out, complete with steps!

Even though we didn't find this one I'm pretty sure we were close and maybe once we have a little more experience we'll give it another try. 

Cache #3 

This was a multi part hunt called "Gangsters in Joplin" and the clues were all around Bonnie & Clyde and various other gangsters that inhabited Joplin, MO at various times. We found the first location pretty quickly but then ran into GPS/navigation problems and had to abandon it. We'll go back and finish it when we get a real GPS at some point.

Needless to say we had a lot of fun and think it will be a fun new hobby and way to combine a love of hiking with some treasure hunting! I highly recommend it and can't wait for the next hunt!  

Happy Trails!

I love spontaneous and I love hiking so when the opportunity to combine the two on a backpacking trip to the Ozark National Forest presented itself, I jumped at the chance! The original plan was to hike a short trail in nearby Arkansas since the weather was so nice. That plan turned into a backpacking trip and a much longer hike. Unfortunately the trail we planned to hike was closed due to "extreme conditions". When I asked what that meant I was reminded that we are in an extreme drought. Ah. How could I have forgotten that? We were then redirected to the Ozark National Forest. Hmmmm. Thinking the forest might be affected too, but what the heck. We wanted to hike and we'd just carry in water. So, off we went.

This was the sun setting as we started off on the trail...the path was somewhat steep and really rocky but it was still a path.

That path got steadily steeper. Guess that's what happens when you are climbing a mountain! 

The sun setting was beautiful and definitely distracted from the uphill climb! We just kept going...and going...and going uphill. 

Loved the way the sunlight danced on the trees. 

We made camp in a small clearing and just kicked back and enjoyed nature. This is what I love about hiking!  No cell phones or tv...just the sounds of the animals and insects. The stars through the trees were spectacular! 

Morning brought the sounds of thunder and potential raindrops so in the darkness of pre-dawn we packed everything up and headed out. Things look a bit different in a dark forest. Finally we decided to wait until the sun came up and see if we could find the path again. Alas...we had wondered in the darkness a little to far and the path could not be found. 

Thankfully we had marked the location of the truck with my handy, dandy "Find My Car" app.  (Downloaded after an "exciting" post-game search for the car in Norman last year) So, off we went. No trail,  fewer rocks and mostly downhill. Sticker bushes were plentiful though and I was painfully reminded of why pants are somewhat a necessity when hiking! 

Sunrise in the forest in a word...beautiful.

I was sure missing that rocky path about now...

As the crow flies we were only minutes from the truck but as the snake wiggled it was about a 2 hour bushwhack. 

And just when we thought never see it... 

It magically appeared...the truck!!! We aren't really sure how we managed to circle around and find it without ever crossing the road or finding the path again but we were pretty glad to see it! 

Leaving the forest, we were reminded of the extreme drought conditions. This creek was full in the spring.

 And we saw a lot of deer as we were heading out! Seeing these beautiful creatures along the roadside I had to wonder how they were finding water.

All in all, it was a great adventure! Next up...adventures in geocaching! 

Second Chances

"Life always offers you a second chance. It's called tomorrow." ~ Unknown

I recently did an informal poll of my Facebook friends to find out what they might do if they got a second chance at something. I wasn't specific about what that something was, could be anything really. A career/work re-do, a second chance at a great love, maybe even an opportunity to erase a regret. Not surprisingly (at least to me) the responses were overwhelmingly on the side of "go for it"!

To be fair, they are my friends and probably were trying to be encouraging in light of my recent "misfortune" (I'm about to join the dislocated worker club...i.e. unemployed). The truth is 'm not all that worried about it. I probably should be, after all I do have 2 kids, 2 dogs and 2 cats to support and they seem to be hungry all the time. But in reality I'm only a little anxious. Mostly I am kind of excited to have an opportunity to do work I am passionate about...revisit past choices that weren't taken...discover new possibilities. Yeah, I'm probably crazy but life is more fun on the crazy side!

So, what would you do with a second chance? I feel like I am getting a second chance to take a different path, perhaps the road less traveled. Now, what do I do with it? Growing up I dreamed of being a detective. I think that has subconsciously influenced many decisions in my life...I'm addicted to crime shows, try to figure out things out, profile people in public situations, any chance I get to "solve" something really makes me happy. What might happen if I take that path?

I also love photography. I can't draw worth a darn (just ask my "draw something" friends!) but I enjoy capturing the beauty of nature, of random moments in time and who knows what might happen if I pursue that passion!

Opportunities are everywhere...you just have to reach out and grab them!

So, in thinking about what I will do with my second chance here's what I'm thinking:

• Talk less, listen more

• Take risks

• Complain less, compliment more

• Enjoy the present but don't lose sight of the future
• Find a passion and pursue it!

What will you do? 

Oh, the Possibilities!

I've always believed you control your own destiny by the choices you make every day though at times it seems as if the universe is not paying attention. Apparently the universe has decided my life needs to closely resemble an amusement park ride. Each day brings a new twist, crazy turn, and heart-stopping drops. Kind of an ironic twist for a girl that had pretty much planned her whole life. Staying present, living in the moment is something that I work on daily and it is not easy.


The most recent twist happened a couple of weeks ago when the company I've worked at for the past 10 years has announced it is closing in July. It's a sad situation and though I won't go into the details of why this is happening, I will say that I am deeply saddened by the shocking lack of personal responsibility that is rampant in this country. Many people seem to want to take the easy route and place the blame for their own actions on someone else rather than on themselves where it belongs. 


Anyway, that has led to the simple fact that I will be out of a job in just over a month. I haven't been unemployed since I started my first job at 16. I spent the first 24 hours about like everyone else I imagine, just trying to absorb the news. Now, it seems that most everyone I work with seems to have fallen into a state of depression or shock and so the office is a bit somber these days. 


On the other hand, after that first day, I found I had a sudden burst of energy and excitement. I wasn't depressed at all. I realized that maybe this was the door I had been waiting to open. A chance to reinvent myself, chart a new destiny. Oh, the possibilities! Now, I can discover a new future! Be who I want to be after years of doing what was expected! I do have many moments of anxiety though. I am, after all, a single parent to two teenagers that have made it pretty clear they want things to remain the same (school, home, friends, etc.) for them. I want that for them too but the chance to change who I am, change my destiny is pulling at me pretty hard and I find that I don't really want to. 


But...will I be brave enough? Do I have the courage to follow my heart and be open to all the possibilities? I think I do. 

Connection

I’m currently reading “The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brene Brown for the second time. This definition of connection really struck me: the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.

I have spent the majority of my life searching for that kind of connection, where I felt seen, heard and valued for who I really was…not for who I had adapted to so that I could fit in and “belong”. What I am learning now is that changing yourself to fit in is detrimental to true connection, to truly belonging.

Sometimes people come into your life and create the illusion of a connection. Maybe through shared interests or just common friends, either way the feelings of belonging and connection are built. Everything goes along just fine until one day something challenges the relationship…expectations aren’t met…judgments occur. I believe this happens because the foundation of the connection was built on illusion. I believe that people truly feel seen, heard and valued when these things are exchanged with open hearts.

Illusion is created when we see others not as they really are but through our own filters created over time. Perhaps it is true that “we don’t see the world as it is, we see the world as we are.” What we see in others isn’t necessarily what is true and real but what we expect to see. At the same time, when we don’t live up to expectations we shake that illusion and cause a rift in the relationship. When a relationship (of any kind) isn’t built on true connection (the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.) it is probably doomed to failure. 

What do your relationships look like? Are they built on illusion or true connection?

Happiness Resolution: Patience...AKA Courage

On my journey of discovery, I started the week focusing on patience. Why I have so little sometimes...how can I get more? Well, I haven't found those answers yet but what I have discovered is that in order to improve my patience I need to practice courage.  I'm not talking about the patience it takes to wait in a long line or maneuver through rush hour traffic. I'm thinking about the patience it takes to navigate major life changes, to live in the present and not the past or the future.

When you think of courage what pops in your head? You might first think of courage as bravery in the heroic sense. Our military, firemen, policemen, they are all brave and very courageous. They risk their lives regularly saving other people. That is extraordinary courage. But what about ordinary courage? What if courage also means to be brave enough to carry on after a painful loss? To say "I don't know" when you are expected to know? To admit failure when success seems the only option? What if courage is patiently waiting for something and knowing it might never happen? What if courage is facing an uncertain future and being brave enough to take those first steps? What if courage is simply trying again...and again...and again?

Courage requires vulnerability, being willing to put yourself out there and trust you won't be destroyed in the process.  Possibly we experience anxiety over vulnerability because we see it as a weakness. In ourselves it might feel like a failure because we expected to be strong and able to do whatever was needed and that isn't what happened. Seeing vulnerability in others might inspire empathy, pity, sadness. I think we practice courage in these times by looking for the possible positive outcomes, by providing support to others and letting them know they aren't alone.

I watched an interview recently with the parents of a young boy who had been bullied in school and committed suicide. I watched those parents be courageous and vulnerable as they told their story. They were ordinary parents who did everything they could to nurture and protect their child and yet it wasn't enough. They were struggling with acceptance and trying to create something positive out of their loss and I realized that is what courage is to me...that quiet little voice that says "I will try again tomorrow".

What does courage mean to you? 

Could forgiveness be a key to happiness?

I've been thinking a lot about forgiveness, both giving and receiving, lately.  In my journey to rediscover my identity I seem to have stumbled across a couple of roadblocks and despite my best efforts it doesn't seem as if I am going to be able to get through my identity work without some forgiveness. Believe me, I would really just like say, "yeah, whatever" or give the memories a swift kick in the… but that doesn't seem to be working this time. It's kind of like in the movie "Groundhog Day" and I seem to be stuck in repeat mode. So, I guess it's time to face the music.

I thought it might be good to start with understanding what forgiveness really means. There seem to be a lot of general ways to define forgiveness: burying the hatchet, letting bygones be bygones, forgive and forget, stop resenting, make peace, and on, and on. Webster's defines forgiveness as "the ability to forgive". Um, ok. That seems helpful.  So, what does it mean to forgive? Well, apparently (according to Webster) "forgiving" is: allowing room for error or weakness. Hmm. Not sure if that makes more sense but it does seem simple enough. 

Since Webster wasn't helping all that much I thought I'd give Google a try. Google knows everything right? When I Google forgiveness I get 56.8 million (yes, million) results in .19 seconds. Great. This is gonna take longer than I thought. (Did I mention I'll probably be working on patience next?)

With all this information, I'm wondering if forgiveness is a conscious choice, a decision to be made or is it an emotion you feel when your heart is ready to let go of blame, hate, fear...? Negative emotions can really make your heart feel heavy. But is it up to your heart to decide when to let go or does this require some conscious effort on the part of your brain? 

Hmmm. Maybe this is a job for Oprah. 

I saw an episode of Oprah once where she defined forgiveness as: "giving up the hope that the past could have been any different." Now that is an interesting definition. It seems to imply that whatever happened was meant to happen and you couldn't have changed it. That may be true but I believe it's our choices lead us to outcomes, both good and bad. And we can't change those outcomes. Well, duh. Of course we can't change the past. To be fair, it would be nice to have one of those hot tub time machines for a "rewind" though! Since that doesn't seem possible, we have to be able to accept what happens and move on.  

That may be easier said then done. Sometimes the choices we make lead to an aftermath we never saw coming and cause us great pain. Sometimes we have to be able to forgive ourselves for those choices. That seems to be the hardest for me. Especially when the choices you have made led to a less than desirable outcome.

I don't much care for the "giving up the hope" part of Oprah's definition.  That seems like denial or maybe I just think hopelessness is sad. Either way, I don't necessarily agree with that part. However, I can see it more as "accepting  that the past could not have been any different." I think this works for me because it allows me to accept responsibility for the role I played in the outcome and also to see that, good or bad, what happened is in the past and it can't be changed. To spend time trying to change it or beating myself up over it isn't going to make it different. What I can do is try to understand what I can do differently in the future to get a different result.  

Thinking about "accepting that the past could not have been any different",  I can accept that I played a part in what happened through the choices I made and I also understand that I wasn't the only one making choices.  If I can accept those things can I also accept that what happened was meant to happen? Perhaps those choices, those outcomes led me to where I am today, led me to become who I am today. Perhaps my identity isn't based in the past but is something that is emerging with each day filled with new choices and new outcomes. Hmmm. Perhaps. 

The key to happiness...know who you are!

A few years ago I stumbled across the book "The Happiness Project" and thought it was the perfect find. I was going through a bit of personal turmoil and I looked at that book as my guidebook to complete and utter happiness. Little did I know that things would get much worse in the personal turmoil department and the book would get set aside while I struggled with just surviving life.

Now, years later, I have been thinking about where I left off in the "project" that would consume far too many of my waking hours and (perhaps) a few of the non-waking hours as well.

(It might be important to note that I have a tendency to chase shiny objects, i.e. distractions, on a fairly regular basis...let's call them squirrels, yes, squirrels with shiny collars. So, I apologize if I sometimes ramble and get off track, but consider yourself warned!)

So, back to the "project". One of the assignments early on was to create your list of commandments, your rules of engagement. I think the goal was to get to a list of 10 or 12. I got 1. Yes, 1. And I got stuck there...for the last 2 years. You might be wondering what could be so difficult about this that I would get stuck on the first one...well, #1 is "Be Shelle". Sounds kind of simple. I mean it's only 2 words for pete's sake. And you'd think in my 40+ years I'd have at least some idea who I am. I mean, really? Well, I didn't. Guessing I still don't because I was recently challenged to work on "identity". Grrr. Part of me wants to point out that "what you see is what you get" but that seems kind of shallow. I don't think I'm shallow.

So, I am back to working on my first commandment of "Be Shelle" and hopefully that includes discovering my identity along the way. I have a feeling this is going to be a bumpy ride. 

Happiness is a journey...not a destination

I haven't posted on this happiness blog in a while so I thought today might be a good day. Not because I've finally found that elusive "happy place" but because I may finally be figuring out where to look. There's a saying I like..."if it is meant to be, it is up to me". I think happiness is the same way, if I am meant to be happy, it is up to me to make it so.

The challenge, for me, seems to lie in letting outside influences have a heavy, well, influence on my happiness quotient. Actually, I don't think I am alone in that. I think it is really easy to jump out of bed in the morning ready to take on the day only to have your kids pick a fight, traffic be a nightmare on the drive to work, coworkers be difficult, the list can go on and on. All of these things can, and usually do, have an impact on your happiness. It's hard to be happy when the world seems to be conspiring against you right? However, when you give others the power to "make" you anything (happy, sad, angry, etc.) you are giving up your own power. Only you can change that. I believe if you spend more time focusing on what you have influence on rather than on what you have no control over then you can start to shift your happiness quotient to the positive side of the scale. It's hard to measure happiness because it is a feeling, but you know it when you feel it so let that be your guide.

Have you ever thought about what your superpower is or would be if you had one? I think I'd like for my superpower to be "happiness generator". I could totally love that superpower! I believe that doing good things for others can (and does) increase your own happiness. So I am going to practice this for the next month...or year...or even lifetime, by doing something good for someone else every day. I think it may be important to look inside ourselves for happiness and that may include generating it for others as well.

It might also be important to think of happiness not as a destination, but as a journey? I believe a journey looks more like a squiggly line in the end, not a straight line. If happiness looks like that it probably has a lot of ups and downs, twists and turns. I've always believed that everything happens for a reason so perhaps the "not so good" times exist so that we can better appreciate those really good times. And when the good times come along...enjoy them! Live in the present. Don't let past regrets or future fears steal the present from you. Enjoy the good moments, celebrate the great moments and move on from the rest!!